Itchy Arse

Clayden too, had been having some diarrhoea after Beau had his.

SO that night over MSN,

Clayden: Dear... my ass so itchy...

Beau: Huh? Why?

Clayden: Had diarrhoea...

Beau: Arse tear?

Clayden: No... Too much purging. Feel sore...


Now now horny lads, let's not think too much. Though honestly, I would've thought the same as you too. LOL. F**ked too much? LMAO.

Drunk Driving

Beau is the stronger drinker between the two of us. So he is usually the driver even when we were just to drink 2 glass of beers. (Of course, if we were to get pissed drunk, we usually had a proper plan, accomodation included).

So one day, after drinking 3 pints of beers in one of the bars, and getting slightly tipsy, he got all worried as I was driving.

Beau: Dear, are you okay to drive?

Clayden: Yeah of course...

Beau: Sure?

Clayden: Positive...

Beau: But you looked high...

Clayden: I am... But not as high as that time in xxxxx.

Beau: Of course not. You can't even walk straight.

Clayden: But I wasn't the one vomitting.

Beau: *pouts lip*


LMAO.

Losing Weights

Beau's been having bouts of diarrhoea since the past week. Not sure what was the cause. But he didn't go to the clinic, just rehydrating himself after each visit to the loo.

End of the week when we meet up,

Beau: Dear... I feel so light.

Clayden: Huh? After shitting so much?

Beau: Yeah... Shit until I lost 2kg.

Clayden: Seriously!

Beau: Yeah! You don't believe me do you?

Clayden: No. That's scientifically impossible.

Beau: Haha.

Salmon

We're both quite fans of Japanese sashimis. So we've tried the few Japanese buffet restaurants in town. Tenji and Shogun, as well as Tao. And most of the times, we would just go for the raw oyster, raw salmon, raw tuna and any other sashimis available. Very rarely would we take the sushi or the tempura.

So one day, before heading for our reservation in one of the Japanese restaurant...

Clayden: How much is 2kg?

Beau: Just a small plate in the gym.

Clayden: But the amount of salmon weighing 2kg, is it a lot?

Beau: *choked* Of course!

Clayden: Yeah... that's what I thought. I'd probably gain less than that no matter how much I eat.

Beau: =.="


-.- Well hey, buffet isn't exactly in the diet for one who's watching is food intake for the Zeus-like physique, no? LOL

Shitty Business

Over MSN one night...

Beau: Dear...

Clayden: Yes dear...

Beau: I have stomachache again... Big business a few times. And kept farting... Loud smelly farts T_T

Clayden: Me too... But not much shit... Just small little portion of smelly soft shits.

Beau: Dear... How come both of us are having stomach problem at the same time?


*shrugged* Me wonders too.

Straight ahead

Sometimes, Clayden becomes the driver for Beau on their usual weekend dates.

Clayden: So... where is it?

Beau: Straight. Go straight.


After a while...

Clayden: Straight again?

Beau: Yeah. Just go straight.


After a while...

Clayden: Straight?

Beau: Yeah, turn there.

Clayden: Then?

Beau: Just go straight...


Finally...

Clayden: Can you just roughly tell me where is it? I get restless over so many directions...

Beau: LOL Ok ok!

LOL. Seriously, if you were to drive, would you be told the exact location first, then only the direction; rather than to follow blindly at a direction. It's just like you're walking not knowing where you're headed....

F**ked

After running the half marathon, the leg was so painful, no thanks to the lack of training, that Clayden walk so slowly.

Beau: Dear... why are you walking like that?

Clayden: Cuz my leg hurts still...

Beau: You walk as though you erm...

Clayden: What? Like what?

Beau: Like you were just *toooot*.

Clayden: *double swt*